As a foreigner (“Barang” as the Khmer say) in Cambodia, it is not an unusual thing for me to watch or experience something and make a face that looks like this: 0_o
Cambodian culture is very rich and complex, full of traditions and rituals that rank as the oldest in southeast Asian history. To the Khmer, the things they do are normal. To us Barangs, however, sometimes things don't quite add up.
One of the things that puzzled me most (and still bothers me to some degree) is this trend I've noticed where people will wash their hands BEFORE using the restroom and AFTER eating. In America, of course, we tend to emphasize the washing of hands AFTER the restroom and BEFORE eating. The thinking, as it has been explained to me, is that you never know what you have on your hands and, since we don't use toilet paper here, you don't want to risk wiping yourself with something that could cause irritation or a rash. And you wash after eating because at some point in the meal you will have used your hands to eat something.
Another thing that I still am not used to is the gender touch barrier. In Khmer society, it is absolutely not okay to touch a member of the opposite sex unless they are a family member. This can be difficult for foreigners, especially from western cultures, where we tend to use touch as part of our communication and displays of affection, both romantic and platonic. What makes it even more difficult for us lighter skinned Barangs is that we are a novelty item in Cambodia, and people love to touch us. And thanks to the modern movie and music world, most Cambodian men think all western women are begging for them to sleep with us. When I go into the market or take a ride in a taxi, it is not unusual for women to grab my arms, stomach, breasts, or legs. It's a Khmer woman thing, so I don't mind it too much. Even my host mother, whom I live with and see every day, still strokes my skin and grabs various body parts. The men try to do the same thing, but because I'm not your average bear and actually abide by the cultural norms, I don't let them.
The last time I was in my market, a man tried to touch my butt and one of the grandmas in the market came out with a big meat cleaver and told him to leave me alone or he would walk away without his manhood. It is times like those when I really appreciate being loved by my community!
Something that I really have a hard time with is the language—there are SOOO many words and phrases that sound alike. For instance:
“friendly” is pronounced: rayuk tayuk
“more diarrhea” is pronounced: reyuk teeit
“mango” is pronounced: swvy
“monkey” is pronounced: swva
“big” is pronounced: toam
“ripe” is pronounced: dtoom
These similar sounding words go on and on...a lot of the time it makes for some great comic relief at home. One night I was talking with my family and trying to explain that I like my mom's students very much because they are kind and friendly. What I ended up saying, with my blunders in tenses an verb conjugation, is: “I liked your students because they had more diarrhea.”
They though I meant that I like the students because they have more diarrhea than I do! I also once told my mom's students that they climbed the trees like mangoes.
Probably the funniest thing with the language that has happened to me is that I was in a taxi once, and it was very crowded (12 people in a 5 passenger car). I was trying to apologize to the lady next to me for being so big and taking up so much space. What I ended up saying was: “I'm sorry there is no room. I am very ripe.” Ripe, beyond the American connotation of “smelly” is also a euphemism here for being pregnant. The lady felt my stomach and looked very confused for a while. She then said, “maybe Barang babies have a different shape in the stomach.” The whole rest of the ride she kept trying to give me lotus beans to eat, because they are good for the baby.
On one nearly disastrous occasion, I used one of the verbs for “to love” incorrectly. There are a lot of words for “to love” in the Khmer language, and you use them for different things. You love chocolate differently than you love your mother, and differently than you love your spouse/partner. My host mother asked me if it would bother me if she had her afternoon classes at our house. I tried to say that it was no problem, because I love kids. I accidentally ended up saying that it was no problem because I like to have sex with children. 0_o For the record: THAT IS NOT TRUE!!!!!
Once my host mother and I were on the same page again, we laughed until tears ran down our faces.
